Mothering Madness

Not sure about you, but sometimes I feel quite certain there’s a jertain behind…no wait, I feel quite certain I am losing my mind. By nature, I struggle with anxiety. And lately, anxiety has been rearing his ugly and uninvited head. (Okay, okay, I may or may not have invited him. I’m just saying…I did not MEAN to invite him). Anyhoo, here is a list of things that has been making my heart pound too quickly, my mind race relentlessly, and my words come out too tersely:

  • bluebonnets…must find a location to take a picture…oh heck, taking pictures period. Not enough moments captured on film. Right?
  • sports…to do them or not…and which ones?
  • church activities…yes? no? too much time away?
  • Fiesta…which events? No events? Where are the events? Ouch…too much!
  • toys…minimal or not…how many, which toys?
  • food…”real” food vs. processed and balance between
  • potty. training. oi vey…reminder of my INCONSISTENCY…which I am pretty certain is a biggie when it comes to parenting
  • screen time…how much? Oh how I love some time to myself…oh how I love it…and oh how the girls loves screen time. Sigh.
  • attachment…one of my girls is a cling peach. Is this okay? Do I need to encourage her to LEAVE. ME. ALONE. I am an introvert for the love of Pete!!! Go. PLAY. By. Yourself.
  • hand-washing. We just don’t. Ever. Except after the potty, and really, who around here is actually using a potty?
  • baths…we try to squeeze in two a week…sometimes three. Ewww?

I am certain there is more. But here’s the deal, none of these has anything to do with character development. And that is my focus. Right? Ack. And so, I must BEAT BACK the beast of culture while lovingly embracing those who do it differently…while still feeling adequate myself. Whew. This mothering thing. Tough stuff. Yeah?


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